You're never alone so long as you're loved
by BlondieBrit
Summary: FrancexJeanne, BTT, FACE and others probably. Sad beginning but it's going to be a fluffy thing of Francis struggling with Jeanne's death and his friends help him to recover. Has the potential to be really cute :3 (I'M NOT CONTINUING, NOW IS TWO-SHOT with potential)
1. Chapter 1

**I really struggled to categorise this. It's basically FACE but is still morphing and I'm not sure what the main pairing will be in the end, there'll probably be a few of my favourites :3 hope you enjoy x**

Francis thought his heart had stopped as the bushy eyebrowed doctor told him the news. What should have been one of the happiest days of his life was now the worst. His wife, his Jeanne, dead… how could she be dead? His last memory of her was her screaming with agony, being rushed into the emergency room and as he tried to join her, the doctor told him to stay outside. She hadn't wanted him in the room with her, being always composed and quiet, she didn't want him to hear her in pain nor see her having an operation to have the baby, she thought he'd be ashamed of her for not being able to naturally give birth. He never could make her realise that didn't matter, that he loved her more than any love he thought possible and that nothing could change that, she forever wanted to be the perfect person. She was perfect to him from the first day they'd met.

It was at university. Francis was dragging his friends out for a night out in town and she was sitting alone at the bar, a smile forced on her face as if she was waiting for someone. Francis was good with body language, and knew that she was alone that night. He'd sat next to her and smiled at her, asking if she'd like another drink. Gilbert and Antonio soon noticed he was missing and joined them at the bar, drawing attention to them all but she smiled more naturally and it was the most beautiful smile Francis had seen. It lit up her face and he felt a blush on his cheeks at the sight.

They swapped numbers and because she wasn't too keen on his friends, that was her reason at least, the next evening he came alone and they ended up walking along the beach together and talking so freely with one another, that deep secrets were shared that hadn't been with anyone else. It wasn't long before they were a couple, and were the adorable pairing, the envy of everyone.

On their graduation day Francis proposed to her and she said yes with happy tears in her eyes, their friends clapping and whooping as they kissed as an engaged couple for the first time.

He felt fresh tears drip down his face as the memories took on a misty appearance in his mind's eye.

The doctor looked sympathetically at him as he said, "Mr Bonnefoy? I understand your pain but please hold your son. He needs you more than ever now."

"You killed her…you killed Jeanne…" he mumbled incoherently, feeling sick at being touched by this man. Francis was led into the room and almost fainted as he saw Jeanne under bloodied covers and somehow made it over to her, ignoring the crying infant in a nurse's arms next to him.

"Ch-cherie…ma femme…Jeanne…" he knelt to the floor at the side of her bed, taking her cold hand in his own and kissed her delicate fingers lovingly.

Before he new it, he was being forced to his feet, gently but firmly, and turned around to face his child.

"Oh mon bebe, d-de-desole," he sobbed, taking the child and holding him close to himself, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "I love you so much. I love you Matthieu. I-" he looked at his little son properly and felt his already dead heart shrivel away. He looked so much like her…

Francis turned and caught himself staring at the sheet covering his wife and trembled with emotion, letting the nurse gently take the baby away just in time before he sunk to the floor and sobbed into his hands.

The doctor left the room then, searching for someone who could help this man better than himself.

After a few minutes, the bereavement counsellor gently pushed the door open and sat on the floor next to a still crying Francis, pulling him into a hug.

"You're being watched Mr Bonnefoy. A little baby is very excited to finally meet you." The nurse was crying silently at the scene and the counsellor nodded that she could take Matthieu to a different room and that they'd follow. She left obediently. "Let's get you up now to see him. Come on sir." Francis stood up shakily and a little whimper sounded involuntarily at the sight of his Jeanne under the sheet again.

Francis walked to the bed and wanted to pull her into a hug but was quickly stopped. "I-Im sorry but that's not the best idea. We haven't um, cleaned her up yet sir."

He shoved the counsellor away and pulled the sheet off Jeanne onto the floor.

The first thing he noticed was her face. She didn't look in pain and he thanked the lord for that. As his eyes trailed down her he saw the long incision where they had to get Matthieu from and he felt like he'd faint. So much blood…

Before he knew it, he was being led out the room.

"Non, one last kiss. Please let me-Jeanne! JEANNE JE T'AIME! " He broke down into heart wrenching sobbing again and the next time he looked up through vision not clouded by tears, he was in a smaller room with the baby, her baby.

"M-Mattieu," he took him from the nurse again and held him close, pressing a little kiss to his forehead, trying to ignore his own tears. Would he ever be able to smile again?


	2. Chapter 2

**uhhhh it's 1am and I'm so tired. If it stops making sense near the end of this chapter, it's because I'm about 40% awake. It was so close to finishing I had to upload it. Thanks for showing support for this story already BritishGentleman and Cami Boricua! I forgot to say I don't own Hetalia but we all know that~ **

Four years of counselling, therapy sessions and anti-depressants later, Francis awoke feeling happy. He didn't realise it at first, the feeling being deeply buried inside of him all that time, but when Gilbert and Antonio let themselves in as usual to make breakfast for everyone, taking Mattieu to school and other such 'friendship duties' as they called them, they found him in the kitchen, making macaroons.

"Francis, you're downstairs!" Gilbert ran to him and wrapped his arms around his friend tightly, up until now Francis had been like a ghost haunting upstairs.

"Does Mattie know?" his excitement faded as Francis looked at him, confused.

"Who?" Gilbert's smile completely fell, he assumed this 'progress' was just another of his regressions. The psychiatrist explained that Francis had a habit of tricking himself into thinking he's in the past before Jeanne died. In these states he doesn't even remember his own son.

"I'll fetch him, amigos," Antonio had finished signing for all of Francis' bills so headed upstairs to bring Matthieu down to join them.

"Watcha cooking?" Gilbert decided that this was progress, regardless of state of mind that Francis was in. He hadn't cooked a thing since that day.

"Macaroons. Here," Francis said calmly, handing a spoon covered with mixture to him. Gilbert playfully leant over for Francis to feed him but as his lips touched the spoon, Francis let go, the spoon clattering to the floor.

"Five second rule!" Gilbert shouted, and picked it back up, shoving it in his mouth just as Antonio came back with Mattheiu in his arms.

"Gilbert, that was on the floor," Antonio scolded, and sat Mattieu in his chair. Gilbert just laughed.

"Francis, you're making breakfast today?" Francis nodded and, seeing how confused Mattieu was looking, Gilbert sat next to him, ruffling his hair.

"Good sleep Mattie?"

"Yes thanks, I woke up and turned the nightlight off and slept even with it off!" he smiled proudly, as did Gilbert.

"Impressive. Luddy still needs a nightlight to this day." he grinned at Mattheiu's smug expression, so different to his usual one of shyness. Ludwig wouldn't mind being used for the child's entertainment, even if was a lie. He wouldn't find out anyway.

"Does he?" Asked Antonio and Gilbert cringed, hoping he wouldn't mention it to anyone, least of all Ludwig.

"I wasn't talking to you Toni. Help Francis with breakfast." He hoped Toni would take the hint and start to prepare normal breakfast but he didn't of course, and just started washing up some things that he thought Francis was finished with. A little tug on Gilbert's sleeve returned his attentions to Mattheiu.

"Why is Francis downstairs?" he asked, almost fearfully. The lad was one for routines, and his routine involved Francis being upstairs.

"Hey Mattie, he's your papa, you call him that okay?"

Mattheiu looked down and swung his legs. Francis scared him and he wanted Gilbert or Antonio to be his papa.

"What do you want for breakfast? We've got an hour before it's time for school."

"I…I don't mind Gilbert."

"Now, what did I tell you? Say what you think, it's only me. I can't be offended. I don't mind what I eat so long as it's something because I'm starving. So, food?"

"Well, I-I like the sausages you make but I sort of want some syrup too…"

His voice got quieter and quieter until it faded away altogether but Gilbert caught the important bit.

"The awesome würstchen! Good choice, man I'm hungry now..."

He got up and started getting everything ready for sausages.

"Gilbert, these take 2 hours in the oven. I'll make something else…"

"Nein, just talk to Mattie. Francis you go too. We're having a Gilbert breakfast today." Excitedly, he raised a sausage in the air and shouted "Frühstück, deutschen stil!" (breakfast, German style!) resulting in a giggle from Matthieu.

Francis let Antonio guide him to a chair and hardly noticed the little child's smile turn shyer.

"Toni?" Francis asked distantly.

"Si amigo?" he sat in between them, oblivious as always, and waited for him to continue.

"I'm gay." was all he said, followed by a slight smirk and shake of the head.

"You are? I don't think so Francis…" what he was going to say was interrupted by a loud cackle from Gilbert.

"You're not gay! Now _this_ is gay," he said, pointing to Antonio who just shrugged in acceptance.

"Non I mean it. I never want to be with a woman again because she won't be Je-" they froze, he'd never spoken like this before, let alone say her name. "-won't be her. But men are different."

"Should we be talking about sex in front of Matt, and at breakfast time?" Antonio asked innocently, ignoring Gilbert's angry look, he wanted Francis to talk as much as he could about anything the man wanted to.

"I'll help Gilbert. Shall I?" asked Matthieu, but Antonio and Francis were still discussing whether or not Francis was gay, and Gilbert hadn't heard him over the sounds of cooking. Mattheiu considered going over to him but just watched him, head on his hand, looking forward to his a breakfast of two of his favourite goods, sausages and maple syrup.

Breakfast was soon ready and they were all tucking in, Gilbert having cut up Mattheiu's and Francis' sausages for them, still not sure how aware Francis was of what was happening.

"Gil, ask me if I'm happy," Francis said, staring at his plate. Gilbert exchanged looks with Antonio but he asked warily, "are you happy?"

"Oui. I am. I have forgotten how to show that I am, but I feel it inside." he closed his eyes and pushed the plate of food away, slumping down in his chair.

"Come on, no sleeping at the breakfast table!" Gilbert teased, shaking him gently but soon stopped, still not sure what his limits were today. Upon noticing Mattheiu had eaten all of his food, Gilbert cut Francis' food up and dumped half the sausages on Mattheiu's plate.

Antonio stayed behind to wash up and keep and eye on Francis whilst Gilbert drove Mattheiu to school. He was quiet as usual on the way but seemed to be still unsure of why Francis was downstairs. Gilbert chatted to him all the same, trying to return his day to normality, and talked about his brother, how to make sausages, his dilemma of which flowers to buy the girl he wants to ask on a date and various other things he likes to talk about with Mattheiu. The boy joined in a little, and seemed to be relaxing, thoughts of his papa being replaced by what Gilbert was talking about.

They soon arrived and Gilbert took his hand and walked him inside as usual, greeting the staff and discreetly scanning the room for any child who was looking negatively towards his Mattheiu. and upon seeing no one of the sort, knelt down and hugged him tightly.

"Enjoy playschool Mattie, you'll be at school soon and then high school, university, job!" Gilbert cackled at the boy's excited expression and kissed his forehead before standing back up and ruffled his hair.

As Gilbert left, Mattheiu felt his heart sink and he looked around nervously at everyone, ignoring him as usual. He slowly walked over to the wall and sunk down, wrapping his arms around his knees. Soon he'd be at school and would meet new people, ones who are nice and play with him. He couldn't wait. Before he knew it, tears were filling his eyes and he cried silently for a good half hour, nobody realising he was even there.


End file.
